Asher Daniel Chappell

edible encouragement

I was supposed to fly out of DFW last night but major storms were brewing so it wasn't a surprise when they told me my flight was canceled. Then after 40 minutes on hold with AA and getting booked on different flights for today and twice they were canceled due to the plane not being able to get in last night thus not being able to fly out today (learned a lot about air traffic last night) I finally resigned to fly out Friday. A little bummed but glad for not having to fly in bad weather.  

But I am sooooo excited that I was home today because if not I would have missed getting these. 

  

A fellow hairdresser sent them to me as a thank you for sending some clients her way. What Stacie didn't know is that Chocolate covered Strawberries have for years been my VERY favorite!! But most of all, it was the thought that brought me to tears. (which was nice because nothing is better after a bunch of tears than chocolate!!)  I didn't expect it to impact me the way it did... but this was SO sweet of her to think of me...and to send something displaying her thoughts.  

There are so many people in my life that deserve buckets of chocolate covered everything!! And knowing what this feels like to receive this makes me want to be a lot more intentional with letting others know how much I appreciate them and am grateful for them. 

Stacie, Thank you for totally surprising and blessing me today with these sweet treasures of goodness. (they taste amazing!!) I love knowing that you get to love on my Raleigh friends and nurture their hearts while caring for their hair. You are gifted and I am so glad that you get to display that giftedness on those I love. Thanks for thinking of me and for totally making my day! love you. ~ Casey 

 
 
 
 

A Year in Life....

     A year can change much in ones life. This Christmas looks so very different from the last, in so many ways. Last Christmas as I slept, I was not aware that my precious wife was holding the news of our new baby right next to me. Last Christmas brought Joy and elation of what this year would bring with the pregnancy and a new baby. We thought of this Christmas and how much fun we would have with a new baby in the house. Those hopes turned to sorrow with grave news and then brought new hope through prayer and longing. But this hope was different it was not a presumptuous hope, but one rooted in what the Savior could do. Today as I look back to August 9th, I feel the excitement of the day and the overwhelmingly painful end to it. I miss Asher terribly tonight and wish he was here to celebrate our Saviors birth with us. 

    Yet God makes all things new! This is the message of Christmas for all peoples. Christ, the King of Kings, and Lord of lords took on flesh and dwelt among us (Phil 2, John 1). As I write this evening I am listening to our Precious daughter Zoe sleep (it is one of my favorite things). It was appropriate that we named her Zoe. Her names means life, and she is a reminder of that to us. She is a reminder of the hope that Christ brings in the Gospel. Christ brings life where there is not life. Who could know the workings of God just beyond the sight or the clear perception? God is working in ways that we cannot see, and not just to ease suffering but to work in and through it. I am thankful that God has led me to praise His name in sorrow and now in His great grace toward us.

    Perspective is everything! God has taught us this year to see all things (good and seemingly bad) as part of the Gospel story that He is weaving through our days. We need to see His Son when life is not as it should be, when family betrays and offends and friends disappoint, the Gospel demands mercy. When circumstances fail and tragedy strikes the Gospel brings hope. We need to see Jesus and still long for him more when life brings abundance, when a healthy baby comes into our home, when we seem to have all that we want and need. Jesus is still and forever better! 

    Christmas will forever be about babies for me, because of Asher, because of Zoe, but lastingly because of Jesus Christ! I am thankful that on this holiday when I am prone to think on the loss of life and the gift of life, I am faced with the inescapable life of Jesus Christ. I am drawn to long for His second advent when all will be made right for eternity. God help me to live with this perspective until you come..

Dan                            

The symphony that God orchestrated....

Looking back it's amazing to me the things that God orchestrated and ordained that we are so grateful for now but could never have planned it to happen that way then....... Here are just a few!

* Conversations- Early on in this pregnancy God brought some intense conversations into my life with others that really made me seek out what I believed when it came to God's Sovereignty in Pregnancy and also in Life and Death situations. I had not looked at these conversations as instruments that God used to drive me to search out truth in specific situations but as conflicts that left me in self pity. Oh, that I would trust God in each and every relationship and conversation! He knows what He is doing and uses others to refine and sanctify us in ways that we alone can not accomplish because we are prideful.

* Gender- Our desire to know this child's gender. We could have been content not to know, but both of us were dying to find out and thus went to Prenatal Peek!

* Prenatal Peek - they let us come back 3 different times weeks apart from each other which isn't really their policy normally but each time (we even had 3 different ladies) they had compassion on our quest for the gender of our child and told us to reschedule a few weeks out and they'd re-scan. We had already decided that after the third scan we were going to give up the quest if we didn't find out... but that was the one where that sweet nurse discovered and alerted my OB to the omphalocele. I seriously don't think that we would have ever known otherwise.

* Hanging up- The receptionist that hung up on us at our first specialist office. Both of us had our doubts about the staff we had been placed with at the first perinatal place we went to but never thought we had any other option. They treated us like we didn't know what we were talking about and really never respected our desires to fight for this child's life regardless of what the outcome would be. But it wasn't until Dan called to request something and ended up getting hung up on because of a misunderstanding. We were confused emotional expecting parents yes, but we just felt like no matter what, getting mad and hanging up on a patient was unacceptable. So that began our quest for a new team of Dr.'s

* Connections- Our friends that were nurses and friends who had experiences with medical professionals in the area.
I put out a call for help in finding the right medical help and SO many people were helpful and instrumental in getting us into the great amazing staff at UNC Chapel Hill. We even knew WHO to request and what to expect from them. So helpful! Thanks friends!

* Patience - Because we didn't know what this baby was it really helped me not spend a lot of money on clothes that would never be worn. It made me delay a lot of purchases that I might have had to painfully return. (a lot of people have asked me if I had to return a lot of stuff and if that was hard and GOD really was kind in that we really just had bought or had been given the bare necessity or timeless investment pieces and it was all things that we LOVED and will Lord willing use again!)

* Amnio- When we asked about getting the amnio on week 36 and deliver on week 39, our OB had suggested just moving it to week 37 and testing the lungs and possibly delivering then.... At first we were excited at that idea but something just didn't sit well with me about it and after really thinking through it we decided to stick with week 36 for the Amnio. Well we had results in 24 hours (which even the hospital acknowledged was rare) and we knew our baby was trisomy free and we knew then that Asher was going to be our firstborn son!!! This is why that is so important looking back.... if we had waited till 37 weeks we never would have had the amnio and thus wouldn't have known that it was a boy we were expecting and when Asher was delivered because of the omphalocele rupturing during delivery and the spinal/lower body issues the Dr. told me that they couldn't have been able to really tell me his gender that day. I couldn't have imagined holding my child not knowing what name to call him or her and even now I shutter to think of it. We were given a whole week to rejoice in our son by name and to really celebrate him!

* Time - Because of when God chose for Asher to come we had an amazing medical staff and had several believers who I believe really impacted my whole experience of giving birth and going through the c-section. (It was a really hard c-section and I hated it but they made the difference and were SO wonderful!)

* Day of Delivery- Because of when God chose for Asher to come we had people/family at the hospital right away! God even worked out for members of our families to come in from out of town just a day or two later... and had so many elements come together for that to happen. We are so grateful for the sacrifices and time that our families made to be a part of this time and the special touches that you put on his memorial and burial. We'll never ever forget that.

* Awareness - Because of our journey of this pregnancy and because of so many dr.'s not giving us much optimism we had really already began to open our hands to this child and really were trusting God to give or take away... This child was His to do with as He pleased. Not to say that we are happy with what He chose or that we were ready to lose Asher, just that we had a vivid understanding at that time of the realization of God's Sovereignty in this situation. We knew that God was the giver and taker of life and that our hope wasn't in the medical staff. So when we were told that Asher wasn't going to live... we still had hope and had open hands with which to offer our son to a Mighty Strong Hand that would also hold us as we cried and suffered.

* Gifts - the night before Asher was born we had a little get together with friends to celebrate Asher's coming. (little did we know he was on his way that next day!) And we were given several things that are now precious useful things in remembering his life. Aunt Brittany gave us a little bag with an outfit that ended up being the outfit that I had ready for the hospital the next day and was the perfect outfit for Asher.... any other outfit would not have worked with what situation we had. It was so timely and I can't imagine what we would have done without it. God knew! There were certain other small gifts that were given as well in different stages of pregnancy that really were all the more special as we were able to use them in the small time we had with Asher. (so many of those things people had said, I just had to pick this up because I thought of you! Often they were random gifts...or so they seemed, but God used them in big ways! Always remember that when God brings someone to your mind when at a store!)

* Sunday - God planned that on the hardest morning of our lives as we would have to hand off our child to be taken away that SO MANY (I can't emphasize how many and how vast) bodies of believers were gathered together and lifting us up before the throne of grace. Thank you Body of Christ for praying that morning for us. My tears are flowing as I imagine God's view of that morning as He was so near and close to us in that small hospital room and yet so HUGE and Omniscient that He was working in hundreds of bodies of believers all across America flooding them with His spirit as they prayed and worshiped! What an Amazing God!

Open Door - When Dan and I discussed where to have a memorial service we knew that Open Door Baptist Church was the only place we could imagine having such a personal service. It's where Dan and I developed our friendship and where we were married. It's a busy growing church and we knew that having such a service last minute would be a challenge but that day was open and they were amazing to serve us in ways that I will forever hold close to my heart.

Programs - My sister was married earlier this summer and actually had changed her wedding colors mid- planning. So due to this change she had a ton of Paper Stock in Asher's colors that she had bought for that but didn't use that she was able to be make into Asher's amazing memorial birth announcement! She told me that in such a short time that we had to plan everything that they never would have been able to get a hold of those materials in time had she not had them already. We were so blessed. And blessed to have had her ability to make those for him, They were perfect and so special to have to give others as his proud parents.

Treasuring Christ Church - Our church body. TCC is a Raleigh church plant and has only been a church for 3 years. We have been down here from the beginning and at times it's been tough, we went through a time where we wondered if we had what it takes to be a part of a new church in a needy downtown area, to really commit to a church that takes covenant community and accountability seriously. Thankfully our church loved us and challenged us to stay. We are so grateful for so many... really countless ways in which TCC has ministered and blessed our personal walk with God, our Marriage and now our family as we morn our little one. They are faithful to make sure that we remain faithful, hopeful and ever learning, worshiping and trusting in a Big Sovereign God who is the Comforter and Author and Finisher of our Faith! Thank you Church Family! We love you.

So, Where was God in all of this you may have wondered? Please wonder no more. He was there and He was not silent nor sleeping. We serve an Active and All knowing God who will never cease to bring me humbly to my knees by His works and by His love for me in even the littlest aspects of my life. Lord, Keep me on those knees and dazzle me time and time again for Your Name Sake!!

Rejoice With Those Who Rejoice!

Thanks for Rejoicing with us!!!! I can't say how much we have loved reading your comments, messages and emails! It's like having a room full of people loving on us and smiling and laughing and praying words of thanksgiving to our wonderful Lord! Thank you!!
We set up the baby bed last night... Thanks "Aunt Nicole"!!! I can't wait to show you pic's of the nursery. I can't believe I'm having a son!!!! (Dan got out all the baby NC Tarheel and baby NY Yankees stuff we have for the baby... I couldn't help but think about the fact that I need to remember how to keep an open hand when it comes to my child's life each time it runs onto a sports field and I'm tempted to fear. I still can't see how you momma's do it when it comes to football...goodness!)
We love you all and we're so blessed to have each of you in our lives. And Please continue to pray for Asher!

Asher Daniel Chappell!

As you can see from the title our initial results are in and we are having a little baby boy! We are also overjoyed to let everyone know that the initial results show that Chromosomes 13, 18 and 21 are normal and there s no sign of a trisomy at this point! This is great news and our great God deserves all the glory for He has given great grace today! The results mean that the "lethal" issues they were suspecting, are not there. The genetic counselor told us that it is not impossible for there still to be other chromosome issues present in the full and final result. She said that the initial test showed the most common ones and since that is normal it isn't likely for it to be chromosomal but it isn't impossible. We are optimistic that Asher is just small and that the Omphalocele is causing much of the "problems" they think they are seeing.
Asher still has a long road ahead but God is still forming him and caring for him in my womb. Please continue to pray and that God would heal any heart issues that are present, heal any scoliosis or Spinal bifida that may be there, and that he would shrink the overall size of the omphalocele.
God alone deserves the glory for this day and we praise him for he is good! thank you to all of you praying with us and to those who joined us in prayer and fasting yesterday. God has heard the cries of His people! Let his glory and renown be made known today through this!

More to come......

Quick Update for Today

We went in today for my amnio and were met by the genetic counselor to go over what exactly we could expect and so forth. We found ourselves engrossed in another discussion about hospice care or aggressive treatment and really it felt like we had been there a hundred times before. We believe God has given us a real ability to speak clearly with them and to respect their wisdom but let the ethics we have in Christ shine through as well. The counselor had an intern there with her and even though she sat back and listened, she nodded her head in agreement whenever we talked about cherishing this child's life and our ethical stances... I really feel like the Lord had her there as a silent encouragement to us as we talked boldly and clearly about our desires. I wonder who she is and if she'll talk about us to whoever she comes home to at the end of the day? We so desire to not only speak for our child but impact whomever we talk with.
We went in for an ultrasound and that went well (we had an amazingly sweet ultrasound tech). Again, we saw some of the same things but were encouraged by some great pics (our baby has quite a bit of hair). We were thrilled to see and hear the heartbeat (166 bpm) and to see our baby moving all over the place. we are reminded today what a blessing it is to have each day with our baby and to know that God has sustained this little one for 36 weeks now!
The Amnio went well and fast. The whole thing was mildly uncomfortable but I feel great and I am taking it easy today. We saw three tubes of fluid go off to the lab with so many of our hopes and prayers with them. We both feel a little down today. I guess knowing that we are going to know in a few short (but long) days is kind of final. There is hope no matter the outcome but it feels a little odd today. The initial results (fish results) should be to us sometime Wednesday or Thursday. This will tell us about Chromosomes 13, 18, 21, and X/ Y (Boy or Girl-yeah!!!). The full results will be final in about 2 weeks.
Please continue to pray for us to rest in Christ and for the health of our baby. Thank you to all of you who are praying and to those who have joined us in todays fast. We love you all so much.

Casey

a few posts to read...

Here are a few posts that I've been meaning to write and update you all on.

Dan and I are doing well and we have been striving to live in a spirit of hopefulness and of perseverance. Dan only has two more weeks of summer before 08-09 school year begins and even though he's really looking forward to spending his days with the students he's trying to really enjoy these last few days of freedom!
I have two more weddings to photograph, tomorrow I"ll be in Winston Salem shooting and then next week back in Wake Forest! God has been so good to allow me the strength and ability to fulfill my responsibilities to these families this summer. We will have photographed 13 weddings this summer and each one has been wonderful and unique! Though I could not have done it without Kristin and Angey who are amazing photographers and love and serve me so well.

I'm almost to the 35 Week mark! Each week goes by so fast and I'm so thankful that God has given that week to us.
Dan and I are going to the beach this whole next week to get away and relax and spend some much needed time together before the real hectic time is upon us. So pray that we are able to relax and that we both are able to put aside work for a few days and just focus on God and each other. (this is really hard for me because I'm always thinking about what I need or already needed to have accomplished, though I"m blessed to have clients that are very patient and understanding!)

Just to update you on what is to come in the next few weeks;
This Sunday Dan is preaching at Forest Park Baptist Church where he used to be the youth pastor at (it's also where he was at during our falling in love/time of engagement) The people are so precious and we always enjoy going back to be loved on and hopefully to edify them as well!

Then we'll leave to go to the beach until Friday August 1st which is Dan's 34th Birthday!!

August 2nd I'll photograph my last wedding pre-baby!

August 4th at 10:30 we will go to UNC for an amnioseticess..... now, I know you might be thinking, I thought you weren't going to do one of those and we didn't due to the risk of preterm labor, and we weren't going to do one at all. However, after several OB visits and listening to them inform us that they really won't do anything to the baby as far as aggressive treatment until the results come back for the Trisomy and then depending on that the treatment will or will not be offered. So, we would rather not be waiting when treatment might be needed and if the baby does has a Trisomy we would rather know that we have found a Dr. who is already willing to use his skills on a baby who might not live as long as most. This might be a difficult task but we are hopeful that there is a Dr. at UNC who would be willing and able if needed.
So, we will have FISH results back in 3-4 days that will tell us the bigger things such as the Trisomy issue and also gender... We'll have a baby with a name finally!!! I can't wait to announce that on here!
And then in 10 days we'll have the full work up which will tell us I think the extent of the Trisomy or Genetic issues and I guess some more information that will hopefully be helpful to the medical staff in treating our child.

They have scheduled my C-section for August 27th at 11:30. I will finally get to meet this little one!! Pray he or she stays in my womb until this day!

So, a lot is going to happen in the coming month and we will definitely keep you up to date as best we can.
There hasn't been a lot of new info lately thus my lack of posting... I'll try to get better about that!

Thanks for reading and for being so faithful to comment and encourage in so many ways! We feel very loved and cared for.

Have a great week! ~ Dan and Casey

more music recommendations

These are two CD's that I've been given recently that are so great and every mom should have them!!
The first is called Sing Over Me: Worship Songs and Lullabies
It's by some of my favorite female artists such as Christy Nockels and Nichole Nordeman
The songs are so precious and comforting!

The second is called SEEDS: Family Worship;Praise
It's one in a series and it's scripture set to music.. with tunes that don't drive parents crazy!!
Great for older kids but I know how early those little ones pick up songs!! I still remember scripture from songs I learned in Children's Choir way back when!!

Guest Author on POH Blog

I had the great opportunity to be a guest author on a blog that I have followed for quite a while now. Prayer of Hannah is a blog by five ladies who have a passion for raising families and honoring their husbands as unto the Lord. Last week was a week they dedicated to grief and loss and I was able to share as one who hasn't walked down that road but has been told I might. Click here to read my post!! and Ladies, this blog is a great weekly read for you!!

I went ahead and posted here my post!

Hi, My name is Casey Chappell and I'm a friend of Hollie's. First I just want to say a public thank you to you POH Ladies who have been so faithful in writing on this blog. What a blessing it is to so many. Thank you!!
Secondly, I want to thank each of the ladies who have written and shared the depths of their soul this week. I've learned so much and I know your words will continue to impact my life in the next few months... even years.

I am writing during this "Dealing with Loss" week not because I've had a miscarriage or a loss but because I've been told that I will most likely have a loss in the coming months. My husband Dan and I found out we were pregnant on Christmas Eve... well, I found out then and then waited to totally surprise my husband on Christmas morning! I still can't believe I kept it in those few hours, but it was totally worth it!! We were both so happy! ....fast forward past those first few months that every woman deals with normal fears of miscarriage, and so many potential unknowns that we have no control over. {If you are reading this and are in those precious early weeks of pregnancy, those fears are not to be minimized by what others may be going through but are rooted in the same sin of fear that each of us have had to face even when nothing was going wrong... fight it now, because it will not go away just because you have a great pregnancy and delivery... it
will continue to take hold of your heart and rob you of years of peace...fight fear mommies and rest assured by a God of peace!} well, we made it to 20 weeks, "what? we can't see the gender? That baby just doesn't want us to know I guess. let's try again in a few weeks... still, no clear shot of boy or girl.... ughhh..." So in our search of this child's gender we headed to Prenatal Peek in Durham. And you'll never believe that they saw us 3 different times trying to find out what this child was (they kept saying that the baby was so curled up and sitting so low that they couldn't see anything) Finally, our last try... The lady who was doing the ultrasound kept looking and looking and I thought her frustration was due to the fact that she was failing to answer the question on our minds. But we found out the next week that she was upset because she was seeing something that the Dr.'s and past ultrasound techs missed and it wasn't good. So she called
our OB and they called us and scheduled a level two scan and indeed we found out that our baby had a giant omphalocele and most likely a lethal Trisomy. We couldn't believe our ears... it had been such a perfect pregnancy so far, how could this be happening to us at 28 weeks?

Since that day we have been thrown into a world of high tech medical scans, heart echos, genetic counseling, sobering talks with Doctors, NICU tours, and hospice packets. We are told no matter what our baby ends up being born with, we have a long road ahead of us and a high chance that our baby will only be with us for a short time, if the baby overcomes the 50% chance of being born alive. Talk about HOPE ladies, I don't think I have truly hoped and prayed for something like I have been the past 5 weeks.

But I do want to briefly touch on a few things that are currently helping me fight for daily faith and provide a future hope.

First, a theology of a Sovereign God. This has been something that for years I've been trying to really wrap my head around and now God is wrapping it's amazing truth around my heart. The fact that I can place my trust in a God who is totally in control and sovereignly ordains suffering in the lives of His children for His Glory and their joy is so comforting. That fact frees me from Fear, Guilt, Despair, Bitterness, Control, and Anger, and so many other sins that would be so easy to become engulfed by. It's a hard truth that so many don't understand and that many reject. But let me say that He is a Good God who has every detail of this pregnancy and the life of this child ordained and for His glory. My husband wrote Here on this more extensively.

2 books on this that I have found extremely helpful:
Trusting God by Jerry Bridges
Future Grace by John Piper

Secondly, God's People have been so used to bless our lives and to encourage us and lift us up when we couldn't. They are prayer warriors on our baby's behalf and they are there to help us fight sin that can so easily seep in to our lives when we are weak. Many have asked us how we could be so open about all this while going through this trial and all it's unknowns, but we can't imagine not having so many surround us during this time. I encourage you, if you are going through a trial please surround yourself with God's People and call upon your Church to walk through this with you. You have no idea who will impact you and how many your struggle and story will impact as well. That is how God designed the church body to work. (I've found that when I'm not sharing my burden with my church Dan and I take out so much anger and frustration on each other, the Dr.'s, and even the ladies who check us out at the Dr.'s offices.)

2 Practical ways to live this out weekly:
Start a Blog: it will give your church body and family a way to read updates and your hearts cries in a way that prevents you from becoming tired of sharing your story over and over. Many need to hear it but we can grow weary in talking to others especially when you are being vulnerable. Great Blog sites: Blogger, WordPress, Typepad.
Place yourself in a small group or Sunday school class in your local church body: You may even have felt like you didn't fit in in the past or lacked the discipline to go, but there is something about a smaller group that allows them to really take ownership in carrying your families struggles and joys during a time of great hardship. There are so many aspects where a local church can help, from finances to medical connections to transportation to giving you scripture that you need to get through this time.

Lastly, The fight for faith is a daily one. I was telling someone, it's like I'm being told I'm going to have to go through something that I can only look at and say there is no way I can go through that. But God hasn't given me the grace to get through next week or next month yet. He's given me the grace and strength to get through TODAY... and often it has to be enough to get through this hour. I find that when I'm looking ahead and focusing on those coming trials that I am missing the present grace needed to speak rightly to my husband now, the strength to get my responsibilities for today done, the joy I have complete access to in order to endure with joy my pregnancy during it's 33rd week, and the desire to run to God's word for wisdom that I will need for a conversation later this afternoon with my neighbor. We miss out on so much because we aren't living in the grace provided for today. Which ironically is the same promised daily grace that will
be given to get through those coming days that we worry about and look to with dread. (Ref Mathew 6:25-34)

2 daily acts that will encourage this outlook on grace:
Listening to hymns are a great way to saturate your hearts with sound scripture and theology of this good sovereign God! Click here for some music I have found so helpful.
Rejoice in Today: do things that celebrate what today holds. (we can be tempted to live in the quest of something to come... healing for our child, a positive pregnancy test, our due date....) But God has given you today and given you what you need for today. So, parents-to-be, go do something that you won't be able to after the baby comes (dates, trips, salon visits and even grocery shopping) Are you waiting for healing or medical answers? there comes a time where you need to turn off the computer and stop researching for a day or more. Celebrate special days, birthdays, 100 days (in the hospital, out of the hospital, of life,) bring gifts to your medical staff or special people you meet through this. Here is an example of a couple who really celebrated each day! Can't make those two pink lines appear for anything? Go on Mission Trips. You won't always be able to do those and you are seeing the world. Babysit for others. That will keep your heart soft and your vision of what kids will be like in a right light.

A side note to those who may be presently walking through medical issues with your pregnancy, lack thereof, or with your children. I am so amazed at the technology out there and the medical minds that God has given these Dr.'s. But I am also astounded and horrified at the absence of the knowledge of God in most of these hospitals and Dr.s offices. Some times Dan and I feel like we are alone when we have to stand on our ethics and beliefs in front of these people. But we still stand. We have really found that you have to really question and research EVERYTHING they tell you in regard to treatment and procedures.... especially when you're dealing with an unborn child with a possible lethal condition. But Moms, God gave these children to you and you have to fight for them, even at times with those who are supposed to be the ones giving them the best medical care possible. The medical world often clashes with the theological world. Stay alert and seek advice from Believers who are in the medical world and from your Pastors. Stay true to your instincts. We have had to leave two medical practices because we did not feel as though they respected our beliefs and desires for this child. And though that was so scary to be out on a limb like that, it was such a great decision in the end. We have had to tell a Neonatologist that she was beating a dead horse in what she kept saying to us because we felt differently about a certain procedure and that we needed to move on to a different topic. We have had to cancel procedures that we had appointments for just because we didn't feel right about it and were not comfortable doing it. All those things are not easy to do when you have someone with a specialized medical degree telling you the opposite and saying that your reasons are not valid. But Please stand strong. You won't regret it and God will be your source of strength.

3 Websites I have found so helpful:
Wikipedia (so great for looking up definitions to just about anything!)
The Ethics and Religious LIberty Commission
A Great List of medications that have been researched on the effects of an unborn child

Thanks for reading this long post. I hope you have found it helpful and resourceful in walking through what today holds and will help to equip you in trusting in a Sovereign God who WILL sustain you in the coming days and months and until He returns. It has already reminded me and convicted me of areas where I fall short daily. Blessings to you all. Casey Nichols Chappell.

Today's musings....

I'm always thinking to myself.... I should blog about this...this being whatever I"m thinking about or experiencing at the moment. funny things, ironic things, sad things, I want to share it all with you blog readers. What's sad though is that I have started blogs before and feel behind in them and so every time I would go to write something current I would feel like I had to catch up first and then that funny-ironic-sad moment doesn't seem as interesting weeks later. So, I'm trying to be better at this blog now.

I had a photo session in Wake Forest tonight of a Senior Class of 2008. (I'm able to shoot a limited number of those this summer but I'm almost done with sessions until post baby! I already feel very funny with a camera bag, camera and my ever growing belly in the heat and humidity.) But I ran across two hair clients that I've known for a long time and it was so great to see them. After living and working in WF since '99 I can't ever go there without seeing people I know!! But the thing everyone is always so sweet to ask me is "how are you doing? how are you holding up?" and I really just wanted to share on here that I am doing Wonderful!! I really have had the best pregnancy a girl could ask for. I mean, I've got the normal aches and stretching pains and such but it's all because this baby is growing! I'm so thankful that the safest place for this baby to be is within me! What a honor as it's mom to provide my child that right now. I am realizing that I am really REALLY becoming more and more attached to this baby and overwhelmed by my love for him or her! I really can't wait to meet my firstborn. I really REALLY hope each one of you have that opportunity as well.

Love you all!! I"m off to the movies on a date with my husband!! I love him!

A Quick Update...

Today we went to UNC and received great care. We met with Dr. Bogess (she was great). We did receive an answer to prayer, being that they were very willing to respect our wishes as far as the vast majority of this goes. We were thankful to hear her recommend a C-Section as the type of delivery in order to protect the Ompohalocele and give the baby a better chance. She still was not very optimistic about the long term prospects but she said it could give us more time. We were also pleased to hear that The decision not to have an amnio for now was fine and that they would proceed fine without it. There would be no need to really have it prior unless we just wanted to know, because the Baby can be stabilized (hopefully) and the doctors could take 48 hours to test for the chromosomal abnormalities that they suspect. The Omphalocele can be medically stabilized without surgery for a time and then we can proceed to the next most life threatening issues which would be lung development and the suspected heart defect. I know a lot of details... We also met with a pediatric surgeon and toured the NICU (all very helpful).
So all that said we are really not all that encouraged by the prognosis and we are tired of the term "lethal anomaly" but we did get many answers today and they did take us seriously. We did hear some really good news-a strong heartbeat!! The Doctors and the center at UNC are just incredible. Our Care coordinator Maya is just fantastic at her job, we are so thankful for this much. We are strong today and I think very hopeful. Hope is scary because it increases the pain if it doesn't end well, but hope is worth it. We have a more abiding hope that is Christ and that surely helps to put this in perspective at least today. thank you for your prayers... Pray that this would not be a chromosome issue and that these other issues can be dealt with and isolated pray for our witness to the staff, doctors and nurses at UNC and for physical strength..We love you all so much!

Your Prayers And Encouragement Serve Us With Grace

Thank you for all your encouragement and prayers! They have meant so much to us in these last few weeks. We decided to put this board up in the baby's room. Thanks again so much!